Location: Real Hidden Valley - Joshua Tree National Park, California

My first time rock climbing was a moderate Joshua Tree route called The Face of Tammy Faye, which sounds funny until you’re halfway up a giant stone cheese grater fighting for your life. In a truly deranged side quest for someone attending a yoga retreat, I decided inner peace could wait. I, then, proceeded to cry, scream, over-grip my way all the way up the wall, and to add insult to injury, I got scorched into the worst sunburn of my life.